ARCHIVE

  • Last modified 310 days ago (Feb. 7, 2019)

MORE

Local author shares story of abuse, redemption, victory

Staff writer

For Marion resident Blythe Hardy, sharing his story of sexual abuse was about finding release.

It came in the form of his book, “Our Little Secret, Revealed,” published six months ago, soon after he moved to the area.

Blythe Hardy is a pseudonym required by the publisher because of the story.

He was abused as a child by an uncle a few years older, and overcoming that became the basis of his story, as well as the catalyst for overcoming it.

Hardy began writing the book as part of his therapy sessions four years ago. His therapist suggested Hardy share his story with a friend, and the friend suggested turning it into a book.

“It was easier than I thought because it’s me, it’s my life,” he said.

Years after being abused, Hardy found out abusive behavior in his family was not isolated to his uncle.

Hardy did not continue the pattern of abuse, but the experience had lasting effects.

“That abuse led to a lifestyle of addiction, sex addiction,” he said. “I held onto the secret for 55 years.”

In his book, Hardy features a list of characteristics often associated with sexually abused men, including trust issues, an inability to maintain relationships, and feelings of inadequacy. Of the 12 characteristics and symptoms listed, the only two he never had were drug and alcohol addiction, Hardy said.

The first moment of confrontation came when Hardy’s wife asked about content on his phone. While he expected her to leave after hearing his story, her support was what made Hardy go to therapy.

“I had been suppressing that secret for years,” he said. “I didn’t even think about it. It was like it was pulled from the back of my mind to the front.”

Hardy and his wife are now separated, but they maintain a positive relationship, he said.

Despite being published, Hardy doesn’t see himself as an exceptional author.

“I’m not a writer,” he said. “I don’t claim to be a writer, I don’t even like to read.”

Instead, it was his faith that moved Hardy to finish his book.

“I came to the conclusion that if this ever came to fruition, it wasn’t going to be me who did it, but with God’s help,” he said. “Anybody who knows me, knows I don’t have the wherewithal to do something like this.”

While the book discusses Hardy’s experience with abuse, it also features the caring relationship with his close family members, particularly his father.

“My father was my idol,” he said.

Hardy’s relationship with his father motivated him to feature a pair of poems in the book.

The first focused on his father’s integrity.

Hardy’s other poem discussed the hands of his father, a sign-language interpreter who shared Christianity through signing.

Last modified Feb. 7, 2019

Quantcast